How do you solve a problem like Pete Wishart?

How do you solve a problem like Pete Wishart?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find the word that means Pete Wishart?
A flibbertijibbet! A will-o’-the wisp! A clown!

– with apologies to The Sound of Music

Every time I write about SNP MP Pete Wishart I swear I’ll not do it again. It’s not good for my health. The last time I felt like that was when he wished his fellow citizens a happy new year – ‘Yessers and Nawbags’ alike. It’s the sort of thing that, perhaps in his cups, he regards as humourous. But there’s something about the man, his blocking of me on Twitter notwithstanding, that keeps drawing me back like a moth to the fatal flame.

His latest spasm is in two separate parts and I’ll take them in reverse order.

Today he’s outraged. Pete is often outraged. Here’s the cause of his latest upset:

wishart on EVEL

Dreadful, dreadful disenfranchisement (long word, Pete, it means ye cannae vote). You’re banned, yes banned. Oh, by the way, this was the same Peter Wishart in October 2014:

wishart on EVEL old

BBC website 14 October 2014

You do wonder what’s going on, don’t you? Is it hypocrisy, stupidity, short-term memory loss or grubby party advantage. I think I’ll plump for at least three of those four.

So to yesterday. Let’s try (I know it’s hard) to be fair to Pete. He may be feeling a bit down today. The weather in London is 7⁰C and cloudy. In Barcelona where he’s just returned from it’s 15⁰C and sunny. Here’s one of his holiday snaps:

wishart and carles puigdemont

Must have been warm because he’s in his shirtsleeves. If you didn’t know, he’s the glaikit-looking one on the right. The other punter by the way, and looking slightly uneasy in Wishart’s presence, is the new Catalan regional government president (i.e. prime minister) Carles Puigdemont. Guess what? He’s another separatist. Surprise, surprise.

Catalonia, of course, is part of Spain. I like Spain very much. Not because I’m a unionist and see some parallel with the UK, separatists to be resisted at all costs in both countries and so on, but because of the people, the language, and the lifestyle. I like it most of all because it’s a modern democracy whose transition from a fascist dictatorship was lawful and peaceful.

So do the SNP and Pete Wishart have similar feelings about Catalonia? Do they care about the people, the language or the lifestyle? Of course not. They know only that some Catalans, like some Scots, want to be separate. So on that basis they’ll suck up to them as they hope the Catalans will suck up to them. They have the same motivation and feelings about the Flemish separatists of Belgium (more incidentally could be written about that connection).

Curiously, if we’re talking about nation-building they have no similar known feelings about the Kurds, split between Turkey, Syria, Iraq and, er, Iran, whence Alex Salmond and co. have recently returned on a mission (doomed) to outsmart the UK government.

I hope for his party’s sake that Pete doesn’t venture an opinion on the Kurds. I wonder if anyone’s put in his mind yet the idea of lobbying for a greater Catalonia that takes in the old Catalan areas of France? Now that’d really deal the final death knell to the Auld Alliance.

How do you solve a problem like Pete Wishart?

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